Drift Draft

Late last week, I finished the next draft of the novel I've been working on for almost two years. I've lost count as to which number this is, but I know that it's the third one in that time frame. As I read through it, checking for clerical errors and continuity issues, I'm encountering something I haven't felt in a long time...joy. Typically by this point, a read-through pains me. I get to the point where I can't stand a single word. This time is different. I genuinely enjoy reliving each moment of this story. Whether that is a good sign or not, time will tell. For now though, I'll take it.

Thinking in Scenes

It's been a productive series of several good writing days as I near the completion of the latest draft of my new novel. I've been rewriting the climatic last third of the story, delving in some nightmarish depths of the imagination to harvest the kind of creepiness required to bring it all home. As I've been chugging along, I've once again been reminded of the importance of thinking of a story in scenes. When it comes down to it, storytelling is a series of scenes. One needs to flow into the next, while each must serve its own purpose. The scenes stack up like a block tower, supporting and building on each other. Envisioning it that way has really helped me construct something that I'm proud of. 

There's Gold in Them Hills

I'm currently reworking the last third of my manuscript and had been finding it a daunting task. The existing story line that makes up the final build-up and climax needs to be rethought based on changes in the content and motivations of the characters from the first two thirds of the novel. Rather than plotting it out ahead of time, I'd decided to wait and see where the leading action was taking me. This process always has a way of feeling a bit overwhelming when it gets to this point. Suddenly you have to evaluate the entire story as a whole, draw conclusions about the themes, and enact a plot that satisfies the outcome. It left me feeling a bit lost yesterday...then this morning, I saw an amazing double rainbow stretching from mounting to the next and it reminded me that there are always connections and always a way to get from there to here. Sometimes you just have to look outward in order to find the will to continue on.

Cracks in the Scenery

The thing about writing is that the process doesn't always move at the same pace. I never understood those who sit down every day and say they are going to write 500 words or 1,000 words. Not every scene in a story can be written according to a schedule and I've always found the only way to work is to let the words come in their own time.

This is especially true with crucial scenes, ones that are meant to answer questions that the reader has formed up to that point, while at the same time setting up the next big change in the story. These critically climactic scenes require careful attention. Things need to be revealed in a certain sequence, characters have to speak in certain tones, and the story must maintain a certain rhythm.

Today, I finished one such scene. After day upon day of working on it and crafting it just the way I wanted, I finally inserted a page break and moved onto to the next chapter. It's grueling when these scenes take a long time, but so rewarding when they're done.

The Evil Things We Do....

One thing I've always been a little uncomfortable about is the evil things we do to our characters. As a writer, we send them into horrible situations, cause their lives to spin out of control, and often leave them without any hope of a happy ending. In the current draft of my seemingly never-ending novel, I've been set with the task of inflicting even more suffering on my already tortured Elizabeth. But perhaps the worst part, beyond the sorrow, is the fact that often these sadistic scenes are some of the most enjoyable to write. It could simply be the pleasure that one can find in a horror movie, but I actually think it's something more. By writing those scenes, we grow closer to our characters, we get to know them in a way that we seldom get to know real people.

The Long and Winding Road

Sorting through the pieces of a story to determine which goes where and what section connects with which other is exactly the type of elaborate puzzle I'm currently working through. The craft of writing isn't simply knowing what needs to happen in a story, it's weaving it together in such a way that nobody can see the stitches that hold it together. The New York Times Book Review once accused me of "sketching" and possibly they were right on some level. But I'm not sketching anymore. I'm ready to fucking paint like Rembrandt, just letting the perfectionism within me take hold.

Crafting Terror

Sometimes fixing one problem in a manuscript can open it up to new ones, and it then becomes a test of determination as one begins tackling it all over again. I find myself once more returning to the tortured world I've created in my latest manuscript with the intent of making this large story even bigger, yet more entwined. 

These are times that try a writer and push one to stretch the limits of their craft. Having been working on this story on and off for the better part of three years, this is the project that will determine my dedication, and which I will probably use to gauge my skills. I'm fairly certain this won't be the last go round, but as of now, I'm confident that I will pull this all together and leave the world with a terrifying tale that won't soon be forgotten.    

Stains on the Memory

Over the past year and a half, I've had little interest in inventing new stories to construct. This isn't so much due to a lack of imaginative urges as it is a result of half realized stories lingering around like so many spiders on the brain. Coupled with my fair share of industry frustrations during the course of the past half-decade, I came to the conclusion some dozen or so months ago to focus my efforts on stories that I had already worked on to varying degrees, not in hopes of gaining anything beyond my own sense of satisfaction.

Beginning last summer, I started to write the first draft of a story that had been thoroughly outlined some years ago, while also revising a manuscript that had been completed even years before that. I've since completed two revisions of that story, which now awaits its fate in the aforementioned world of "industry", leaving me the chance to return to the first draft of the other one. Though it's been a busy month, welcoming my first child into the world, I've since begun reading over the chapters that were written last summer and starting the process of reclaiming my train of thought and my mastery of the characters. 

These days I feel that I'm more of a completest when it comes to my work. In my younger years, I was so eager to simply write, write, write...but as I grow older, I feel the urge to compose. There's a fine line between writing a manuscript and building a story. So far, I'm enjoying the carpentry of it.

The Spreading of Wings

After several long months, the revisions of my newest novel have finally been completed. Finishing a third draft, which this essentially was, is never quite the same sense of jubilation that finishing a first draft is, but the sense of accomplishment, while not as enthusiastic, comes with a greater sense of satisfaction. The finished product feels more developed, more complete. 

It's not the last time I will be revising this story. It is off to my wonderful and insightful agent who will surely have more creative feedback. Then, if it's lucky enough to be picked up by someone, there will be more to do. It's hard to say for sure, but one thing I do know is that with each step the story comes nearer and nearer to the images that play out in my head.

Not Like I Was, Not Like I Am

For one of the more intense scenes I decided to add to the revised draft of my novel, I did something that I don't typically like to do; I had my character step out of herself. In a fit of confusion, and a desire for control in a situation that continues to spiral out of her control, she takes on the personality traits of those she fears most. In a way, it's her attempt to understand them, but that's actually more of an excuse for her. The real motivation is that she is tired of being the victim and for once, even if it's for only a short moment, she wants to know what it feels like to be the perpetrator.

In the end, I think the scene worked extremely well and is quite powerful. I believe we all have those moments when we attempt to see how the other lives, so to speak. There's a sense of pleasure to be found in becoming what you hate, as well as a wealth of knowledge to be gained. But it's a dangerous game...and one that was very fun to write. Probably the most fun scene that I've written in a long time.

The Beauty of Creepiness

As I continue to plunge into the revisions of my manuscript and mine the depths of my imagination for the weird, bizarre, and terrifying elements that are to make up most of the added pages, I've been conscious of finding the beauty in these things. I've always tried to present everything in my stories with an element of beauty, even if it's merely in the language used to describe it. Whether it's heartbreaking sadness, haunting terror, or paralyzing awkwardness, I try to show these emotions in a way that is touching and impactful. This story has allowed me to push the limits of this technique and develop my writing in ways that I never would have thought possible ten years ago. When I'm done, this may very well be my masterpiece...only time will tell.

Scattering Demons

One of the most exciting aspects of writing is when fascinating new elements seem to emerge from the hidden depths of the imagination. This process happens all throughout the initial writing, but I find that the most interesting elements tend to come out during revisions. 

Sitting down to re-work a manuscript is sometimes daunting. Knowing that things need to be added, and that certain complications need to be solved can often lead to static thinking. One tries to logically solve these problems, but logic usually leads to boring solutions. However, somewhere along the line, a strange image or thought will pass through your mind, setting free the little demons that hide there. Once struck, the creative energies gather these snippets of madness, piecing them together in impossible ways, and suddenly those formerly difficult problems are given brilliant conclusions.

It's important for any artist to be comfortable letting their demons run the show every now and again.

The Market of Oddities

There was a time in my life when I dreaded getting editorial feedback because I knew it would mean a lot of rewriting and rethinking of ideas that I'd had completed in a form that felt right. Over time I've learned that thoughts are never really completed and have learned to find enjoyment in returning to worlds of my imagination for further exploration. 

After talking with my agent this week, I'll be returning to the goblin market and the fears that are sold there. It's rare that I'm told to make my work "darker" and "weirder," which are elements that I typically find myself toning down between drafts. Needless to say, I welcome this kind of feedback. Adding unusual scenes and aspects is something I could never tire of...it sure beats adding characters or changing character motivations. 

So as I get ready to dive back in, please send all of your dark thoughts and fears my way. Thank you.

Goblins Can Never Stop Me

The whispering begins somewhere unseen, faint but tangible like the sound of leaves dropping in the slow autumn wind. - Opening line from my Goblin Market manuscript.

After months of reworking a manuscript that I had first attempted more than two years ago, this past weekend I finally completed my second draft. Three years is certainly the longest space of time between first and second drafts that I've ever experienced. Given the time that had gone by, the rewrites were extensive. 

A story cannot stay the unchanged when the storyteller continues to grow and learn. This is one of the hardest parts of trying to "finish" a project, because every time you look at it, you are seeing it through different eyes. In this case, the view was extraordinarily different. Thankfully the base structure of the tale was inspired from source material, otherwise I probably would scrapped the whole thing after a three year layoff. 

Though the plot changed, quite drastically in some places, it was the tone that I concentrated on altering. Sometimes that can be an even harder process. Seeing as how I tend to scrutinize every sentence, phrase, and word, changing the tone through the course of an entire novel can get a little exhausting. But alas, I made it the end. Now I just have to read through it and make sure I've achieved what I set out to do.

Even the Sky Changes Colors

I've been working on the second draft of a novel for a few months now, and I knew going into this rewrite that the last third of the manuscript was problematic. I wasn't quite sure how it needed to change, just that it did. My hope was that by cleaning up the first two-thirds, the rest of the story would come together in a new and exciting way. 

While I still don't have a clear path to the end, I can say with certainty that the mess is a little less muddled. When writing something new, it's quite easy to loose track of which themes are the crucial ones and which are just curiosities that intrigued me as I went along. Second drafts are good for that. They focus you on the core elements of the story and guide it along in a concise way that makes for better reading. 

As I enter this last phase, I'm feeling confident. Often my initial distaste for a first draft stems from too many tangents. Snipping them away in a clean fashion usually produces the results I'm looking for.

One Thought Leads to Another

One of the amazing things that happens when working on a manuscript is the way a story can eventually begin to expand all on its own. Typically I always begin with an outline, but I never treat an outline as something set in stone. A story has to be given room to grow organically. The reason for that is simple, as you sit and try to plan a story, your mind tends to work on one linear track. There are connections that are hard to see until the characters develop. I find that the plot often takes turns that I hadn't expected, and one event finds a way of leading into other events. 

Both manuscripts that I'm currently working on have reached that point. It's exciting when the pieces start to come together in unseen ways. With both, I had been a little unclear about how or where they should end, but that haze seems to be lifting now. In the past, this has been the moment where momentum picks up and takes over. Hopefully that will be the case yet again, though I've learned from years of experience that just as connections can remain hidden, so can roadblocks. 

Palling Around with Past Demons

Over the past week, I've really begun to dive into the novel manuscript that I left to whither on a shelf for the past two years. Though I've been working on it off and on since the fall, it's only been the last several days where I've had the chance to gain some momentum on the second draft. I have to admit, I'm truly loving this story.

In the past, I've talked about the peculiar affliction that often happens once I've finished the first draft of a novel. In short, I usually end up hating every word. After becoming so submerged in the words for so long, it's impossible not to feel as though you're drowning in them. Typically I push past that infection and plow ahead to the second draft. Due to many circumstances that hardly seem worthy of mention, that was not the case with this manuscript and it was set aside. 

I remember reading it after the first draft and, as expected, hating it. I felt that it needed so much work that I didn't have the energy to tackle. Funny though, when I picked it up again this past fall and re-read it, I didn't hate it. In fact, I felt it was quite good and most likely better than anything I'd written since. Granted it was still rough around the edges, still needed lots of work (and still does) but it was certainly something that could be shaped. 

I've always known that time away from a project can be beneficial. Time is one of a few things that can provide a shot of energy into a manuscript. Working on it now, I no longer feel as though I'm fighting with the words. It's been enjoyable to reconnect with these characters that I spent so much time creating, and I can't help but feel they are trying to help through the process. They want me to finish their tale as much as I want it finished. So for now, I will continue to enjoy their hauntings as I work through demons of the past. With any luck, the navigation will be a rewarding adventure.

Into the Forest

As I wrote last week, I'm working on two different manuscripts right now. One is a children's novel and the other is the revision of a YA novel. Interestingly enough, both feature an element of frightening forests. The classic fairy tale setting has always appealed to me, though I've had little opportunity to take advantage of it in the past. However, both of these stories have their roots in ancient folk and fairy tales, making the forest and all its darkness fair game.

My attraction to the forest goes back to my childhood. I spent most of my outdoor time in the woods that surrounded the area near where I grew up. Luckily I lived near a decent sized state park, and the housing developments were still few and far between. The woods were a place where children could live removed from the rules of an adult world for a few hours. In that space, the imagination took shape. Adventures were born and characters came to life. I'm really enjoying the journey back there and can think of no better place for my stories to exist.

Oh, Mama

Recently I've been dwelling in a world of dark fairies, utterly fascinated by the tormenting little devils. It started several weeks ago as I decided to return to my long-abandoned novel adaptation of the classic Victorian children's poem Goblin Market. My story is populated with a species of these impish brutal critters and I can't seem to get enough of them.

 

In order to work my way back into the world, I started reading Guillermo Del Toro's book Don't Be Afraid of the Dark, which is a guide to dangerous fairies. The book is fantastic and very informative. I would recommend it to anyone interested in the dark world of fairy tales. And since I was reading the book, I decided to watch Mama, which was produced by Del Toro and also features several of the types of beasts laid out in the book.

 

I had avoided this film when it came out last winter because I thought previews made it look pretty bland. After hearing some positive reviews from people a few weeks ago, I thought I'd give it a chance, especially considering how it might fit in with my current state of creativity. As it turns out, the movie was much more moving than the previews gave it credit for. It wasn't a typical horror story, in fact, it barely felt like a horror story to me. There were horror elements, but the overwhelming theme of the movie was tragedy.

 

The plight of the two sisters was quite moving, and felt comparable to what I've been trying to do with the sister characters in my novel. The way they drift apart in their way of seeing things is heartbreaking, especially at the movie's conclusion. I also thought the way it addressed the dark fairy elements was really well done. The way it revealed the past was exceptionally inventive. Ironically, the only places where I felt the movie didn't stand out was in the more traditional horror scenes, which felt indistinguishable from a million other startle fest films. But the sister relationship carried it through those weaknesses. It was definitely the perfect movie for me, coming at the perfect time when I've become absorbed in the wickedness of fairy creatures.

Road to Revision

Over my recent road trip, I finally began to look at the manuscript I'd finished last month. I'd been holding off reading it for quite a while because I feared it was sort of a mess. Now that I've gone through half of it, I can confirm that it is a mess, though less of the mess I'd assumed it to be.

First drafts are a time to play with themes and ideas, a place to work them out on paper and see what comes of them. There are aspects of the story that I tried to capture that just didn't work out. I kind of knew they weren't working out even as I was writing them, and that added to my frustration simply because I thought I had to make them work in order for the story to work. But time away gives new perspective. I see now that the story can be stronger without them.

Now is the time where I have to weed the garden, so to speak. Narrow my focus. Explore deeper the aspects that are working and abandon the threads that never really wove themselves properly into the story. It's a daunting task, but one I feel ready to tackle at this point. 

Keeping my fingers crossed.