Blimey! It's Talk Like a Pirate Day, Matey!

Ahoy! It be Talk Like a Pirate Day. And what could be more fun than pirate speak. I was lucky enough to pretend to be a pirate through eight chapter books in my Pirate School series. Based on kids I knew in elementary school, I had a blast writing these books.

Some of my favorite pirate creations for these books:

'icky sicky'

'Sea Slug Cereal'

'Seaweed Slop'

You can find out more about there here.

Avast, mateys! Talk Like a Pirate Day be here at last!

It's here . . . Talk Like a Pirate Day! Get yer grog flowing and sing a chanty, it be time to celebrate! Though beware, being a pirate can be full of danger! 

"CAPTAIN!" Vicky yelled at the top of her lungs. She shouted so loud, I had to cover my ears, but the captain still didn't notice.

That's when Inna went up to him and tugged on his coat. Then she gave him a nudge. And when that didn't work, she gave him a swift poke in his belly!

"QUIET!" the captain roared, and the whole crew hushed. "NOBODY POKES THE CAP'N!"

All eyes turned to us! Finally we had the crew's attention!

"But Cap'n . . . we have to tell you something," I said.

He looked us up and down.

"Blimey! Where have ye soggy sea pups been?" the cap'n asked. "You're dripping from head to tail!"

"Arrr! 'Tis not safe to swim without letting the cap'n know," Peg Leg Pedro scolded us. "I thought they would've taught ye that at Pirate School!"

Vicky put her hands on her hips and made a huff. "ARRR! We didn't go swimming! We went belowdecks!"

"Belowdecks!" Captain Dan shouted. "But that would mean we sprung a leak!"

"That's what we've been trying to tell you," I explained.

"Before I could say anything . . . WHAM!

The Bone Rattler was struck on both sides! It got stuck between two huge rocks and stopped sailing!

Suddenly every pirate's timbers started shaking and shivering. It was clear that the ship was sinking!

"Great stormy seas!" Captain Dagger Dan roared. "ALL HANDS ABANDON SHIP!"

Pirate School #8: Shiver Me, Shipwreck! page 45-47

Sailing the seas ain't all easy. And sometimes, it's hard to get a lazy vessel full of thrill-seeking pirates to pay attention to you. So, when that situation arises, a swift poke in the belly is a good way to get some respect. Another way is to insult the blaggard. Nothing gains a pirate respect like a good insult. That's why, with the last entry in Pirate School week, I'm leaving you with some of my favorite pirate insults.

Blunder Head: (also blunderer) Reserved for the clumsy, sea slipperiest of acts, a blunder head is what landlubbers might to refer to as a bone head. But blunder is much funnier.

Greedy Guts: The skull and bone ships are full of this type. A greedy guts cares only for their own share of the bounty. A greedy guts takes too much treasure, gobbles more than his or her share of Seaweed Slop, and is generally a big hog!

Scallywag: Possibly the worst thing a pirate could be called. Being a scallywag (or fraidy pirate) goes against every fiber of the a pirate's fearless nature. 

Daft: A funner way of calling someone dumb.

Hogwash and Gullyfluff: Saying this words accomplish the same thing. By using these expletives, you are basically calling the other pirate as being a fibber.

Barnacles: No pirate likes to be referred to as these shelled beasts that are just scrappers on to the ship. It's as good as calling them useless.

Polliwogs: Especially reserved for wee pirate kiddos, nothing gets at a pirate kid's sails all bunched up quite like being called a polliwog.

I hope you've learned a lot this week and enjoy yer day of plundering. But of course, the fun doesn't have to end. At the nearest book store, the treasure of the complete Pirate School series awaits...now that be a treasure worth seeking right there, mates!

Shiver Me Silly! Pirate Week is in Full Sail!

Inna came running up in a fancy white sailor suit and hat with red ribbons.

"What are you supposed to be?" Robert asked her. "You don't look like any pirate I've ever seen." He laughed.

"Hmmmph!" Inna snorted. "Just because I like to look pretty doesn't mean I'm not a shipshape pirate," she told him. "And just because you're gross and mean doesn't make you a good pirate, either!"

Pirate School #6: Camp Buccaneer page 33

So, tomorrow's the big day...Talk Like a Pirate Day...the day when mangy sea pups everywhere will be putting on eye patches and doing their wee best to imitate rotten scoundrels. But, there be one more lesson to be learned. It's an old one, but one any sea fearing buccaneer should know: you can't always judge a pirate by the look of his gruff. 

It takes more to be a pirate than just looking the part and talking the talk. A pirate comes from the inside. The sea in your lungs, that's what makes a pirate. So, if ye truly want to get into character for the big day, my advice is simple. Get yerself a copy of all the Pirate School books and discover all the lessons Pete and the gang discover along the way (Arrr, shameless plugs are part and parcel with pirating).

Sink Me! It still be Pirate Week!

Talk Like a Pirate Day is in two days and I'm feeling pretty excited...so excited that today, I'm sharing with you one of my absolute favorite scenes from the series. 

In Pirate School: Port of Spies, the kids are sent to port to do a little supply shopping for the ship. But Aaron and Vicky get a little gruffy and fightable with each other, as they often do, the townspeople start to grow weary of wee pirates folk in their village.

Some of the townspeople were standing around watching us. Other people were watching us from inside the stores. And still more people were watching us from their windows.

"Arrr, everyone act normal," I whispered.

"Aye aye," my friends whispered back.

So we started acting normal. We did things that normal, non-pirate people did. I started to whistle and tap my head. Vicky walked in circles. Aaron and Gary put their hands in their pockets and kicked at stones on the dirt road. Inna walked over to the dress shop and smooshed her face against the window to look at all the dresses.

After a while, the landlubbers stopped staring at us.

I wiped my forehead and sighed. "That was a close one," I said. Pirate School #4: Port of Spies page 21-22

So, the lesson from this selection should be obvious to all. It's something every would-be pirate has known since birth...at that is: Non-piratey people are boring AND crazy. That is why we should all enjoy the day on Saturday and spend at least 24 hours behaving piratey.

ARRR! Pirate Week Sails On!

Everyone was counting on me. But no matter how I pushed or pulled, I couldn't get the knot to budge.

"Shiver me timbers, what's taking so long! Can't ye rats just chew through the rope?" Rotten Tooth growled.

Inna held her stomach and gagged. "Yuck! That slimy rope probably tastes even worse than sea slugs."

Vicky made a grumpy face. "Well it probably tastes better than icky sicky fish eggs," she huffed.

Aaron interrupted their bickering. He leaned in between them and rolled his eyes at Rotten Tooth. "Arrr! We wouldn't have to chew it if Rotten Head let us have swords," he said.  Pirate School #3: Attack on the High Seas page 54

There's more to learn about being a pirate than just mastering their speech. Ye must be fluent in their piratey ways as well. That's what Pete and his friends are doing at Pirate School, becoming shipshape shipmates. 

Several pirate rules are demonstrated in the above passage. 

1. Pirate kids never ever get real swords...especially hyper jumpy pirate kids like Aaron. And by their nature, most pirate kids are a little more hyper-active than the average half-pint. Sharp objects...not a good idea.

2. It's never recommended to refer to yer fearsome, green-bearded Pirate teacher by an insult (Rotten Tooth will not take lightly to being called Rotten Head, that's just unacceptable). There is always a penalty to pay. That penalty most likely involves swabbing decks or washing dishes.

3. And this is a biggy...There is absolutely nothing as nasty stinking, foul-tasting, and utterly belly squirming, or squirmy in belly as Sea Slugs. Be it Sea Slug Cereal, Sea Slug Cookies, or Sea Slug Slop. As you can tell from Jennifer's perfect illustration, Inna (the cleanest pirate on the sea) hates them more than anyone. 

If there's one thing that kids find frustrating, be it real kids or pirate kids, is following soooo many rules. But another thing that's for sure is that no matter what they are learning, rules won't ever get in the way of fun and adventure. I've always believed that learning should never be so strict. There needs to be freedom in the process and that's one of the ideas that I hope these books incorporate. 

Pirate Week

"Sink me! We're not really going to walk across that, are we Pete?" Vicky asked me in surprise.

I looked at the skinny plank that lay across the fish tank. It was only the tiniest bit wider than my feet. One slip meant smelling like rotten fish for a month!

"Aye! We have to," I said. "Rotten Tooth is never going to teach us any real pirate stuff. Not unless we prove that we're brave enough." Pirate School: The Curse of Snake Island page 1

In anticipation of International Talk Like a Pirate Day on Sept. 19th, I've decided to dedicate the next few posts to my Pirate School series (illustrated by the wonderful Jennifer Zivoin). Each day, I'll share a little of part of one of the books, because even in pieces, they're fun to read.  In fact, writing these books was some of the most fun I've ever had, mostly because of the pirate speak I was able to interject into the books.

The simple fact is, every one likes to talk like a pirate...especially when the pirates are a bit silly behind their gruffness. In addition to standard pirate fare, I invented some piratey sounding words for the book. Why? Well, because kids always have their own slang and twist on speech. There's no reason pirate kids shouldn't as well.  

Today's Lesson is for Beginners:

1. It's ARRRR not ARRRG (that's a rookie mistake)

2. Aye....it can yes, no, a question, etc. etc. (you'll frequently see a conversation in the books that consists solely of "Aye?" "Aye!" "Aye, Aye!")

3. Anything made of sea slugs is icky-sicky (icky-sicky, I made up for them to say, because it's funny.)

That's it for today, but buckle up, matey's...there's a whole mess more of Pirate School to come! Needless to say Pete (the main character) was thrilled at the news:

"BLIMEY!" I shouted. I was so happy that I danced around. I didn't even care that pirates aren't supposed to dance.    page 54