Tuesday, May 25, 2010

The Great Rabbit Wars Pt. 21

Internal Rodent Army Memo 002 (access previous Communications)
(Confiscated in Raid on Outer Warrens during Second Human Offensive)

-----(Date Classified)----

We Rabbits have long held the belief that our greatest weapons can be found within ourselves. Our determination. Our survival instincts. Our sharp wire-snipping teeth. Our agility. Our strict adherence to social order. But there is one of us in particular with a skill that will win us this war against the humans and that is General Nippon's right paw rabbit, Fival the Hypnotizer.

In the early days of this holy crusade, Fival developed and secured the Human Child Inclusion Program. In the first raids of our military campaigns against the human science labs, our brave Fival discovered that his sonic whisper, due to the irregular nature of his front teeth, produced a wavelength which reacted quite harshly on human children. Through much experimentation, he has perfected the technique and it now ranks as our utmost weapon against the humans. Thanks to this great rabbit, the grounds above and around the Central Warrens and Outer Warrens are shielded from attack by his new species of docile humans. For some reason, the weak-hearted human soldiers refuse to engage them. Though even if they did, these rabbit children have been well-trained and would easily defeat them.

Naturally, the captured children have come to dread their appointments with Fival. The procedure can be frightening to their small minds and in rare cases, headaches persist for some hours after. But is should be known that they are in no danger--unless they resist. However, their terrified cries have led some cowardly rabbits to suggest our dear Fival has gone mad. This noble hero does not deserve such ridicule. Any rabbit in the warrens heard slandering him in such a way will be put out of the warrens without trial and escorted to the border of the Badlands where the wolves rule. All Warren Officers are hereby instructed to post notice.

Long Live Nippon! Long Live the Great Society!

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