One Week in a Life

There are certain weeks in the timeline of life that for one reason or another hold special significance. This is one of those weeks in my timeline. There are a lot of memories attached to this week, and memories create new thoughts as old moments are relived. The week began with memories of 9/11, which felt very far away on Tuesday. But when I watched some recently released audio on Wednesday, the paralyzing horror that I felt that day in NYC came back, but so did the sense of community that flowed through NYC in the weeks afterward. 

At the end of this week, it will six years ago that my dad passed away. I was fortunate enough to be with him and two of my brothers for three days in Houston just before he died. As with 9/11, it's a weekend that increasingly feels far away. The funny thing about time is that so much life happens as it passes, that the accumulation overshadows all that came before.

My daughter is a big part of that accumulation of newness. Yesterday, she wrote her name for the first time. I'm not sure why that is a moment that felt so important to me, but it did. Perhaps because it's one more step toward literacy and the world of stories and learning that such a skill will open for her. 

Yesterday also marked the 20th anniversary of my first date with the girl who would go on to become my wife, my best friend, the mother of my child, and the love of my life. In that course of time, all of the changes that it has brought, she has always been my constant. Though our lives have changed very much, they've always been changing together and I'm so grateful for her.

To celebrate, last night we went to see one my favorite bands of the past few years, The Mystic Braves. They came from L.A. to play in our small city. We were two of very few people to attend, but it was a wonderful night. We were able to walk to the show, enjoy dinner, and "hang out" for several hours the way we used to do before we became the parents of an intelligent, and sometimes demanding, little girl. 

For whatever reason, most likely something to do with the zodiac, the second week of September is one in which the universe has zeroed in on me and chosen to focus its attention. As I grow older, I've come to see all events, both good and bad, as part of the magic of life and try to appreciate the journey...whatever may be, may be.

Father's Day

The past three Father's Days have taken on new meaning for me, for the obvious reason of having become a father, but this year I find myself thinking more about my own father and his passing. He died two years before my daughter was even a thought and it has always saddened me that he never had the chance to meet her. But as I spend this day reflecting on what it means to be a father, I'm also missing my own father and all of the opportunities to seek his advice. I've been thinking about how I'm his only son who has become a father, and know how we would have bonded over this shared experience. And though I miss all of the advice and knowledge he could have passed on, I still have the memories of his actions and will always try to be as wonderful of a Dad to my little girl as he was to me.

Returning to Places You've Never Been

I woke from a dream last night and in my half-sleep, recalled a different dream, one that I had years ago. The odd thing about it was that it took me a while to recall it was a dream and not a real memory. It started with this deli that was sparsely stocked where I remember frequently going to get a sandwich. Then I recalled the streets surrounding it. I knew the record stores on the one street was where I went to get imports. Another street was where I went for new releases. Then I recalled the streets expanding out from this Interzone version of the East Village. I kept trying to remember when I had been there and where exactly these places were, when it dawned on me that I had been there in a dream dreamt years ago.

Everything Changes

The last few days have finally begun to feel like Fall. Perhaps it's simply that the days have been grey and the cool winds have blown down from the mountains, but it's also the smell of Fall that has taken root. I love this time of year, not only for the beauty and the weather, but also the memories.

Over the last week, I've had a flood of long dormant memories come flooding back to me, as they always seem to do around this time of year. It always starts with the back to school days and the memories of starting each new grade. Then it's the afternoon after school memories that come and the faces of long ago friends and long forgotten childhood adventures. 

For me, these feelings are more than simple nostalgia. They often inspire me to write, to dig into the past for inspiration and insight. I will continue to enjoy these days as they lead us into the holidays. I hope you all do as well.

Time Traveling on a Fall Day

Who says time travel isn't possible? I seem to travel in time frequently. I don't get to stay very long, maybe a second or two, but it happens. This time of year it seems to happen more often than others. The way the sun hits the changing leaves combines with the smell of school in the air and acts as a flux compacitor, filling my thoughts of years gone by. Unlike simple fondly looking back, this is different. Rare moments come back, ones that have long been filed away in the bottom drawer of memory. Names, faces, and places that were once forgotten are suddenly there. Events that I couldn't recall a moment before, magically feel as though they just happened. And though I'm not sure what type of sorcery is at work here, I'm pretty sure that I enjoy it.